Always Enough – Rebeka Acosta

In our last post on the series of gratitude, we hear from Rebeka Acosta. Rebeka recognizes how there are so many people to be grateful for, and how those people form a community and help you through the frustrations of life. 

Gratitude turns what we have into enough. -Unknown

At the end of any given day, when the dragons have been slayed, I crash into a puddle of physical and emotional exhaustion. Special needs parenting is hard work and it is terribly easy to let it swallow you whole. There are far more places to hide and wallow than there are rainbows to jump through.

And that is precisely why it has to be enough.

Oh, let me be a part of the narrative

In the story they will write someday

Let this moment be the first chapter.

Where you decide to stay

And I could be enough

And we could be enough

That would be enough

-Hamilton the Musical

It took me a few years to truly welcome the joys and pains of parenting special kiddos. I suppose it is easy enough to find gratitude in the things that make life easier, but as the child of a social worker and teacher, I am always drawn to my fellow humans. No matter how quick the moments come and go, I’m always trying to find the bright spot.

Every year as the holiday season begins, I love addressing cards to friends and family. As I sat at the kitchen table late one night last week, with the dogs curled at my feet, one of the boys appeared in tears. My initial internal reaction was frustration. Everyone was finally in bed. It had been a long day. Couldn’t I get just one hour of peace to address these cards?!

I took a deep breath. Ten minutes is enough, I thought. It will just have to be enough.

He crawled into my lap even though he had far outgrown it. He whispered quietly and asked who the cards were for. We spent the next hour talking about each person and adding a few to the list. This morning I revisited the pile of cards and sitting on top were the five my kiddo had requested, with a sticky note telling me why they were important.

Dr. K: for being my first doctor and teaching Mommy to take care of me

Dr. Becky: for saving Kato’s life (his dog)

The Apple Store: for cheering for me and teaching me to code

Dr. J and my Boston team: you helped me live

Inspirada (our neighborhood): for being my home

May you each find gratitude in the connections you forge and mountains you summit. May you slow down and find the bright spots in the simple moments. And may it always be enough.

 

Rebeka Acosta lives outside Las Vegas with her husband, two heart warriors and
two Great Danes. A researcher by nature and healthcare finance coordinator by
training, she enjoys keeping up with congenital cardiac literature and always
reviews insurance claims line by line. She recently passed the national exam to
become Nevada’s first Board Certified Patient Advocate.
Before relocating to Nevada, Rebeka was a founding member of the Washington
chapter of PCHA. She now volunteers on the National Steering Committee and
enjoys attending the annual legislative conference and transparency summit. She
is especially invested in advocacy for adopted patients and patients of color.
Rebeka welcomes connections at racosta@conqueringchd.org.

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